Welcome to my best friend from 4th grade!

She gave me a Hello Kitty pencil case for Christmas that year and had my heart forever.

She married the first boy I ever kissed, and now she’s reading this blog! (They got married well after the kiss, so don’t worry about it.)

: ))

I’m flirting tonight a bit with workaholism. Been there, done that, got the tired tattoos. Luckily, a key piece of information that would have had me work another 2 hours tonight, easily, is not available to me now. Thank you, universe!

I’m glad I have an office now. Which I will leave at a decent time tonight. I just want to hang out with you a little bit, and catch my breath.

So, catching up, let’s work backwards from tonight.

I played tennis tonight. Doubles. Me and another 3.0 took a set from two 3.5′s. It was surprising and awesome.

On the way there, I called FriendHusband to share a couple of secrets. Something has been bothering me. I bit off all my nails yesterday, and they had actually been looking pretty good. I’ve ‘felt fat’, though I know that’s nothing to believe. I’ve had that soda-can-shaken-up type of feeling. I haven’t wanted to eat meat at all. All pointing to F E E L I N G S.

Before the secrets came out, I called my mentor. Because I had called FriendHusband for celebratory support around a money win today. It pinched a nerve in him. By that nerve being pinched and me saying, "I need to call someone else", my mentor helped me see a little further and more clearly into the future of my business. Also surprising and awesome. I had expected to just get a little pat on the back.

The win before that, which had me shaking like a leaf right after, was me sitting across from two men who I like and admire. Both of them told me No to a request I made around my financial situation. I spoke up in a way that had them change their answer to Yes. Holy crapola. What to even do with that growth?!

Before that, I got a referral from a CPA. A food truck wanting their books done. Now, that is cool. I love seeing business’ numbers. Even better, it’s a BBQ truck. Home cookin’.

Before that (yes, we’re still in today), I got a referral from a tax preparer for a woman who is working on getting out of debt and wants a coach to hold her accountable. Honey, you got the right lady!! I was BORN to hold people accountable!!!!

Before that, I talked with one of the angels, kind of long and deep about my time away with FriendHusband, and then my coming back into the house. (I previously dubbed me and my 2 roommates Charlie’s Angels. Referred to in shorthand as angels.) It was a good talk. Also unexpected, but that’s life, right.

Before that, I flipped a One fit and got upset that FH had his shoes in my room. I really have a hard time with that. I’m embarrassed to tell you I practically threw his shoes out into the hall. (That’s not nice!) There are so few places in the world I can feel clean and relatively germ-free. I know it’s irrational, but I just don’t want shoes in my room. RM, I know ya feel me on this one. Ones Unite!

Before that, I had some of the best set of feelings I’ve ever had with a human being sleeping next to FriendHusband. Holy smokes again. It was like becoming liquid gold together for me. And I don’t mean the furniture polish. I mean real deal high carat sweetness. It even permeated my dreams and I also had fun in my dreams. Then waking up was like a nice dream of its own, and we got to wake up several times together. I think for some of the night I lost all concept of being a single unit human being. His arms around me felt absolutely perfect. This wasn’t even through any special effort I am aware of.

Before that, we had major tension. In the midst of that, we played tennis. But the tension. Awful! Bearable, though. I suppose, also inevitable as two people get closer and closer. Last Wednesday, we also had tension. Thus the title of the post.

He asked a brilliant question at dinner: if I were going to pull away to leave him, how would I do it? And then we both got to see that some of those programs were already in progress! Yes, it should disturb you that the programs run even when I’m feeling deliriously happy. Back door escapes die hard sometimes. It helps to have someone standing right there holding a big flashlight.

Tomorrow….very busy.

Saturday…..very busy. (R, I’ll be at the 8:15. Need to say that one out loud so I don’t flake.)

Sunday…..relaxing. Going to see a teacher with FH at Spirit Rock.

I’m setting my intention to breathe and smile through all of it. Busy, slow, fighting, loving, working lots, playing lots, I want to find that thread of peaceful engagement and live in it.

A former teacher of mine said to be like the rubber ducky in the bathtub. Just float on top of the waves as they come. Easier said than done. But, luckily for me, it got harder to not do so. Float on.

Oh, G, after tennis tonight, I quoted Starstruck and said, "We are all winners." Ol’ skool.

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